Yes, it’s true I gave up about half our family’s income to follow my dreams of being an entrepreneur.
Was it scary? Absolutely!
But you know what, it was the right time. I have done so much work on myself, read books and listened to podcasts about abundance that I know we’ll be better than fine. We’ll be better than we were when I was working full-time. We are going to thrive and be able to do all the things that come with living a financially free life.
How do I know this? Because I do and I trust.
We all have a money story that guides our actions and our thoughts when it comes to our finances. Whether it’s a constant story of debt, taking out loans, never having enough, living paycheck to paycheck, anger towards those who do have money, wondering why you can never catch a break and always blaming someone else for your misfortune.
Do any of these sound familiar to you? I bet a few of them do because many are things I used to say to myself. I still find myself falling into these traps, but I’m recognizing now when I am and working to change my own money story.
Yes, I took a huge risk just cutting off half of our income and so did my husband. He has supported me in all my endeavors and this one is definitely the most risky, but it also has the most opportunity.
I’m starting this new chapter into entrepreneurship with one client and that one client is giving me the win I need to get started, to realize for myself and for others that this lifestyle is not just doable, but even better than working for someone else.
As much as it started with a win, it also started with me entering into fear.
Today is Friday, and just one-week ago I packed up my office and left work for the last time. On Monday I was updating our budget and realized that even with this one client we are in the red by a few hundred dollars and that’s before we spend any money on extras outside of our regular bills. While I’m trying to live in this place of abundance, it is difficult. I spent earlier this week enjoying being home, but also struggling with how to live in abundance but looking at a budget that was in the red.
I went into my tool box and started with simply thinking positively, saying to myself that everything will be ok. I tried to visualize paying off the credit card bill I accumulated paying ahead for things like doctors appointments and a business coach. Even with these tools I was still holding onto this fear of “What have I done? This has to work out.” I could feel myself panicking, not outwardly, but in my gut I could feel myself tensing up being super nervous.
Then on Tuesday morning I did some journaling and just wrote out what I was feeling and let the words just flow. I allowed myself to sit in the fear, to recognize and not push it away. It helped, but I was still struggling with how do I live in abundance but also look at a budget and know there are things we can’t do because the money isn’t there yet.
I brought this up to my business coach and she told me to rephrase the “I can’t afford” with “This isn’t a priority right now.” Hmmmmm…..ok I think I can try that. I continued to sit with that and went back to visualization of really being in the moment of being financially free.
On Wednesday morning I was doing my visualization again and found myself clenching my hands over my chest. I had just listened to a podcast by Dan Mason on money myths and his last tip was about letting go. Then the instant I realized I was clenching I realized I wasn’t letting go. I wasn’t giving up my fear, I was holding onto it instead.
With my eyes closed I released my hands and held them out in front of me with my palms facing away from me. I felt this energy flow through my body and out my hands. It was me releasing my fear, taking my intention of being financially free and sending it out into the world. What I want is not in my control. I must release it to the world and take the small action steps to get there without worrying about the how or the when, but trusting that it will happen.
This is manifestation, and I did this exact thing a few months ago when I found myself holding on so tightly to the idea of leaving work in May to be an entrepreneur and getting my summer with my boys. I kept wondering how to make it possible, but finally I remember just giving up saying to myself “this might not happen as I want, and that’s ok.” Then I went about my life as if it weren’t going to happen and just kept making small steps forward.
Then all of these things started to happen in my life that led me to leaving work, and now here I am home with my boys enjoying our summer together. If I did it then, then I can do it now.
Elsa had it right, it’s time to let it go!!!